I was browsing through my pictures on my cell phone, looking for the picture of the house we're buying when I saw this. It looks like an innocent chair. Sometimes it is. But until I hear those words, "Everything is fine," the chair gets my heart beating faster, my hands begin to sweat, and I try to determine my scan results based on how the nurse treats me.
This chair--the chair where many cancer patients have probably received life changing news--is somewhere I will be on December 28, 2012.
How is it that a simple chair can help produce so much anxiety?
I can't help but have some anxiety. I have a new job I'm enjoying, a house we're moving into, a future we're planning. My 2 year Cancerversary is in January & I want to celebrate it with no evidence of disease.
That sounds pretty selfish, doesn't it?
Blame the chair. It brought back nervous energy.
My friends have moved into hospice, others are beginning new treatments, and one just advanced to stage IV malignant melanoma. I'm thankful to be as healthy as I am. I know that I will handle whatever Dr. D (AKA The Wizard) tells me on the 28th in the only way I know how. I'll follow in my friends footsteps & handle myself with a smile, maybe a laugh, and definitely a little bad ass attitude.
After all, we are bad ass melanoma warriors, right?