2 Years

"But understand this: my commitment to living in the now means

 I'll never ever say that I've beaten cancer. 

To do so would be living in the "tomorrow," if you will, 

and melanoma is far too erratic an opponent to go around making predictions. 

But I can tell you for sure that I'll never give in to it.

 Life is too precious to give it up 

without giving everything you've got -- now." 

Dr. Jack Ramsay.

 This is how I'll pretend I spent my 2 year Cancerversary

but really.......

 If you follow me on Facebook or Twitter, you know I was pretty ill last week. Low grade fevers, horrible night sweats, and odd facial/scalp swelling. I followed up with my local oncologist who basically said my body is fighting something (duh) we just don't really know what. He mentioned the shingles virus or side effects from the latest ipi/placebo treatment.  I don't know, but it really took its toll on me last week. Needless to say, I postponed celebrating!

I was shocked when my sweet boyfriend surprised me with this:

 

I was just sitting on the couch, typing the blog I posted Wednesday night when Mr. Spots handed me a little black box. I said, "What's this?" He told me to open it. I was caught off guard because I had told him I wanted a quiet night, doing exactly what we had planned on doing the day when our lives changed. He said, "It's your 2 year!" Ah, I love him.

Then, the next day, I was on the couch nursing my illness when someone knocked on the door. The flower delivery girl said, "You don't look like you feel good."  Actually, I felt a lot better than I did 2 years ago after hearing those words for the first time.... Anyway, she brought some beautiful flowers from my baby sister that put a huge smile on my face.

The card reads:

"Here's to 80 more...Love you to the moon!"

I am one lucky gal to have so many great people on my side. That includes all of you! Don't think that I slept through your many messages. It was so nice to wake up from my naps to see kind words from you guys. Thank you. You helped make my day so special.

Tomorrow morning I go for the ultrasound that The Wizard, my Sloan Kettering oncologist, asked I get after my latest scan results showed that a cyst on my left ovary has grown from 3.0 to 4.1 cm in less than 3 months. I will see the gyno directly after the scan so I should know something before most of you even get to work! :-) Fingers crossed it is absolutely nothing but an annoying cyst!

Look for an update soon! Have a great week, my friends.

Suprise!

This past Monday I was shocked once again by my unbelievable support system. I knew that Mr. Spots had something up his sleeve because he was being awfully secretive and would not let me stay in my pajamas that I automatically change into after work. However, I had no idea how many other people were involved in this secret....

Mr. Spots, the kiddo, and I headed out for dinner Monday night. Once we arrived at one of my favorite restaurants, I started glancing around the parking lot to see if any of my friends were in on this dinner plan. Not seeing any familiar cars, I decided that Mr. Spots had not been lying, it was, indeed, just a special dinner for the 3 of us. The hostess even played along, "Party of 3, right this way!"

She led us into the party room where a group of my friends were patiently waiting! Surprise!

It was so nice to spend the evening with people who have supported me throughout this past year. Right before dinner was served, I received another surprise. My friend Rayna announced that there was someone who was very sad that she could not attend my party. Because this friend still wanted to help me celebrate, she had arranged for Rayna to order a bottle of champagne and give me a letter to read when receiving the champagne.

I was so lucky when melanoma introduced me to Anne a year ago.

She is one of a kind.

I received another special gift from another woman who has fought her own battle this year. I met this woman this past April before the benefit that local bands did for me here in Roanoke. She is a woman with a huge heart and a lot of love to give. She recently lost her husband due to a massive heart attack, but despite that, she continues to encourage others, offer love and support, and be the same beautiful woman that she has been since I was introduced to her. She inspires me. Alyse gave me this necklace that she has had for 40 years. It stands for good health. Alyse explained that she wants me to have it, keep it for 40 years, and give it to someone else who needs to be reminded that a healthy future awaits her. 

Phew. She believes I am going to be here for 40 years to give the necklace to someone myself. Let me tell you, I had to struggle to keep the tears in check for that one!

After we celebrated with great food, delicious wine, and bubbly bubbly, it was time to head home. Since we had the kiddo, Mr. Spots headed home early so that he could get kiddo tucked into bed without rushing me away from my friends. (Have I mentioned he spoils me?) I thought the special night was over....

That was not the case, Rayna had one last surprise up her sleeve.......

Rayna had contacted some of my melanoma friends and asked them to write me a letter and then she put all of the letters into a scrapbook. Oh, waterworks...To know that some of my fellow warriors took time out of their very busy schedules to send me a letter of inspiration means so much to me. On the flip side, to have a friend who knows how important my molemates are to me means the world! I am, truly, a very blessed young lady.

I ended the night with one extra glass of wine, my guy next to my side, and reading my special book.

Melanoma, you have changed my life dramatically in this first year, but I have gained lifelong friends because of you. For that, I am, and I will always be, grateful.

One year cancerversary!