In Charge

One of the hardest things about being diagnosed with stage 3 malignant melanoma was losing the control I had over my life. OK, I know none of us have complete control of our lives, but our daily schedules are made up of what we want them to be. Early coffee alone on the couch, 8 hour work day, dinner with the little guy and Mr. Spots, heck maybe even five minutes for  a cuddle session with the dude. That's my typical day. While ideally I would like a yoga session mixed in there, it hasn't been happening lately. When I was first diagnosed, my schedule went to crap. My newly diagnosed life consisted of meeting with yet another new doctor, flying to New York to visit my new cancer center, flying home to Virginia to recover from surgery, to moving home with my family to begin 12 weeks of treatment, etc, etc, etc. I lost all control over my life. (Well, during the angry stages I experienced, I felt like I lost that control.) It made me crazy.

All I felt like I had--and it wasn't always--was the opportunity to share my concerns, ask my questions, and pick a new doctor if I did not feel comfortable with the one I had. I was the patient, and while we like to believe that every doctor is on our side, if we don't feel comfortable, how can we have complete faith in the one making life saving decisions?

Source

I'm sharing this because today I received a message on my Facebook page from a woman who had a mole removed 10 years ago. The mole was benign; however, over the past few years she noticed the pigmentation returning. She double checked the area with multiple dermatologists to see if she should be concerned with it. Cathy wrote to me, "...they all told me no - since it had been removed it could not come back and was only pigmentation." Today Cathy went in for her yearly check-up with a new dermatologist. Sure enough, this dermatologist zoomed right in on this suspicious area & removed it. The new dermatologist told Cathy that moles can come back and can become cancerous. Now Cathy is waiting for the pathology report on an area that has been bothering her for years.

I'm like Cathy. I tend to be very trusting. I figure these doctors have had years and years of education and experience, why shouldn't I believe what they say?

While I'm not saying you should doubt every doctor, I do encourage you to find one you trust and feel comfortable with. This is your life we are talking about!

I want to thank Cathy for sharing her experience & encouraging me to share it with you all. She wrote, "It angers me that we trust our doctors so much (with our life!) and we can be told incorrect information that can cause devastating results. I'm so glad I found this new Dermatologist!"

Lesson that I'm still learning: I have no control over melanoma, but I am still in charge of what I do to deal with it. Be your own advocate.

Source

*A huge thank you to Cathy for wanting my readers to hear her story & learn from her experience. We are all impatiently waiting to hear your good news!

Overdue Check-Up

Are you guys as burnt out on political talk as I am? Well, don't worry, I'm not touching on politics tonight. I have new results to share with you tonight...

Due to the craziness of the last few months: new job, trips to New York, and finding the house, I let my 3 month appointments with my dermatologist slip by. Don't worry--I saw other doctors who gave me the glance over, but I knew it was time to get a full body exam when my beloved oncologist, The Wizard, questioned me about it in October. I headed into the office for my 7:10 appointment on Friday with a smile on my face and a magazine in my hand. I wanted to give him a copy of The Skin Cancer Foundation's Journal that I was so honored to be a part of. While waiting for Dr. Cool Guy (I call him that because he's totally unlike other doctors. He's laid back and just someone you want to be friends with) to enter the room, I heard him talking to the nurse: "This is her." Nurse: "Who? The one you always talk about?" And what do you know, my dermatologist walked into my exam room holding his own copy of The Skin Cancer Foundation's Journal! 

(You can read or buy a copy of the Journal here.)

After we played catch-up, we got down to business. I had one mole in particular that made me nervous. Not only did it resemble the mole that eventually turned into melanoma, it also caught the attention of my other doctors. While the dermatologist comforted me that he didn't think it was anything too serious, he said he trusts my instincts. Guess what? It was a dysplastic nevus.  I knew it needed to get off my body!

 

Luckily he got clear margins!

Don't think I escaped with just one battle wound though! Dr. Cool Guy was looking at my back and hesitated for a while, so I knew he saw something he didn't really like. He asked, "Do you mind if I take this?" Of course I said, "Take it." The watch and wait approach doesn't work for us...

I'm totally allergic to the tape they use...Must remember that next time!

That mole also was mildly dysplastic.

My dermatologist is married to a two time melanoma survivor which is another reason why I appreciate him. Ever since he told me that horrible news, he has done everything in his power to help me. We don't shake hands when he walks in. We hug. I respect him, he respects me. No lie, there was a time when I was mad at him. I was mad because I felt like I wasn't prepared for the horrible news he gave me. But how could I have been? We--like so many other melanoma patients--didn't think that mole was melanoma. And let's be real. I wasn't mad at him. I was mad at the shitty situation.

Back to his wife, when I mentioned on Facebook that he had removed two more suspicious looking areas from my back, she wrote,"I'm glad he doesn't trust a mole when it comes to you." She's right, he doesn't trust moles. He will quickly point out what he doesn't like and slice it off. Sure, it may hurt a little, it may cost a lot, but the peace of mind I receive after I get the phone call from his nurse is priceless. 

Let this be your reminder to follow-up with your dermatologist. If you don't like the way something looks, ask for it to be removed! Sometimes you gotta bite the bullet and be your own advocate.

PS--I have now had 4 dysplastic nevi removed since I was diagnosed with melanoma. Have you all had them removed too? Just curious!