Tuesday, February 8, 2011

The Ugly Side of Healing

 Warning: This is not a pretty post.

The family headed back to the Shore today. I could tell they didn't want to leave me, and God knows I have appreciated (and loved) them being here, but this girl needs her sleep! 

Even last night, with the relief that the PET CT was clear, I still tossed and turned. Your mind is your own worst enemy sometimes. I'm sure Mr. Spots wanted to shove me out of the bed. So far, he hasn't... (Don't get any ideas, dude.)

Here's the ugly side of surgery...healing sucks almost as much as the initial pain of surgery. OK, maybe not THAT bad, but it has not been an easy 2 weeks. 

 Wow, typing that made me realize that tomorrow will be 2 weeks exactly since Dr. Pink sliced and diced me. It seems like so much of my life has changed since then... Decisions are being made, thanks to an awesome woman, my Power of Attorney is complete, (morbid, I know. But if you don't have one, get on it.) travel arrangements are trying to be worked out, research is being done, etc. 

It has been EXHAUSTING.

In my first blog I wrote about how I was cut in 5 places: both sides of my neck, both armpits, and a large chunk out of my back. Dr. Pink warned me that I would be sore...he did not tell me about the possibility of continued numbness in my shoulders, neck, chest. 

Think about when your foot goes to sleep. You tell your friend, "Ouch! My foot is asleep." And being the jokester that he is, he hits your foot. The shooting/tingling pain you experience? Yeah, welcome to my life.

On top of the pain, my body rejected either the tape that they used to cover the incisions or the glue they used to seal me shut. Not only do I look like Frankenstein in terms of the cuts, (Yay for pretty scarves!) I am also covered in an ugly, itchy rash. Dr. Pink has put me on some medicine, but so far it has not started to work. Looks like I will be seeing him Thursday after all!

I am really tired tonight. I simply wanted to post to let everyone know I have not received the results of the MRI yet. I called but apparently they are having problems with their computer. Annoying. 

I am going to tell myself that no news is good news!

Now--- I am going to stop talking cancer, take a hot bath, and curl up with Mr. Spots.

I'm pooped.

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